It was hard to decide to leave my tumblr blog but I have to. I need to try new things and grow as a blogger, that’s why I’m saying good bye buuuuuuuuuut I will not delete it. “martinutootin.tumblr.com” will always be there.
below is my last tumblr post </3
“I’M SAYING GOOD BYE TO YOU TUMBLR
Yes, you heard it right. I’m saying good bye to my blog here. It has been a wonderful journey. This has been my sanctuary for more than a decade, 17 years to be exact. Imagine that!
I remember how my blog was all about reblogs and artsy stuffs lang and it turns to personal blog to something I never thought it could be. My blog has been my online bestfriend when I was growing up and struggling my early teenage days. I share all my sentiments here, I rant and rant and I share all my breakdowns here. This has been my online diary for more than a decade and because of that I’m very proud of myself because I decided to join Tumblr. I can’t imagine pano kung hindi ako nagtumblr noon? Kakayanin ko ba yung agos ng buhay?
So, aside from sharing all my personal thoughts here… The most and unforgettable moment na nangyari sakin dito is may nakilala akong mga tao na naging special saakin noon at ngayon. Some of them I’ve got the chance to meet in person pa and get to know them better and most of them, hindi ko pa namemeet hanggang ngayon.
My tumblr days wouldn’t be nice if wala sila. They are the reason why I always sleep late at night. I always crave their attentions back then because I was this kiddo who longs stable connections. Searching for ‘real friendship’. But I come to realize that it is not possible in so many ways. You cannot have ‘real’ bestfriend in a ‘virtual’ world – everything was virtual and that hurts.
I have a huge respect to everyone here. I met so many beautiful people here. Awesome artist and writers. Good people with a good heart. And I feel so home here. I feel valid here. I feel safe.
So it hurts to leave. The feeling is undescribable. I tried to hold back my decision and tried to continue my life here but the fire that was once burning was already dead – gone. And I don’t have the energy to share anymore. It doesn’t feel home anymore here.
I guess my era was done. I was done here like everyone else.
I’m always this kind of person who keeps on holding on even if it hurts but I’ve learn that holding on will only hurt you, will only break you and that’s not healthy.
I’ve learn to love my own self now. Tumblr has been painful for more than a years now to me. But I super love it also. There are no exact words to describe how I love this community, this place, this sanctuary. And my heart cries because the day has come to finally say good bye. I will treasure all the memories forever in my life and I will always be a Tumblrista forever even if wala na ako dito.
To everyone who have stayed, Thank you! Thank you for staying. Thank you for choosing to stay despite the heartaches and sufferings. I owe you a huge chunk of my heart to all of you.
To everyone who left, you are the reason why I’m brave and stronger now. Thank you for coming into my life and I will always miss you and treasure you forever.
To all of my followers, sorry Martinutootin wasn’t strong enough to continue his life here but don’t you worry he will continue his life outside here and he will be happy if you will continue following him. He wants to thank you and share his life with you because his blogging career will not end here. He will be in a different point of view now. Please continue to listen his sentiments and heartaches because no one can do that… Only you guys!
Follow my new home… My new sanctuary here at www.martinutootin.com as I continue breathing out of nothing.
I will not deactivate or delete this blog because I will always come here and I will always listen to all of you forever. I will always be here behind you, telling you ‘its okay’ because you will be okay someday..
Thank you, Tumblr! What a great journey. I love you with all my heart!